Failed in previous relationship makes me think twice for
another one.
I once doomed abruptly on the ground, drowned into the world
of sorrow and sadness. Lost and long for something which I don’t know what that
was. Sometimes I hit the panic button, and keep panicking non-stop. After all,
I was tired. My heart torn and my mind blurred, my body felt damn lethargic and
my feet wobbly like jelly every time I tried to stand up.
It was such a terrible moment of my life.
Despite of all the ordeals, I am gracious for the existence
of a bunch of generous friends around. Hands lend for me to grab on, and made
me stand up on my own. Wisdom words are always spoken from their heart and kept
me alive.
After shading the tears that blocking my heart, after
building my heart with pieces of hard diamond, after standing my feet straight and able
to run, I realized that Allah the Almighty was sending His message throughout
of all these messes. He misses me. He misses my prayer begging for Him, He
misses my praises upon Him, He misses my sujood on 3am in the morning. Despite
of all my sins, I believe He’d already forgive me.
Allah.
Such a bad slave I am.
I am now more rational, insyaAllah, I do believe for
anything happened was just asbab musabab for greater thing to be happened.
Allah wants both parties to feel his Rahmah and Sakinah.
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